" "I was mad at you," she said, the look on her face softeningsomewhat, "but I guess I'd probably lie about it too if I were you.It's weird, and no one wants to be weird. Why do you do it? Do you liketo be a weirdo?" she asked as she slowly circled me. "I don't really know why," I admitted. "It sort of makes me feelcloser to my mom, and I guess I like the way I look, too." There was nopoint in even thinking of lying to her anymore, I realized. Maybe if Imade her see it from my point of view,. She choked a bit on the Coke she was drinking, and a bit of Coke dribbled down her chin. I grabbed a napkin from a holder on the table next to me and dabbed it for her.“Thank you,” she whispered.I smiled, wadded up the napkin, and correctly guessed that the trash can was under the sink, a guess that would be right more often than not in just about any kitchen in America. We both finished our drinks and Summer rinsed the glasses and put them in the sink.“Do you want to stay?” she asked softly.. “I felt like a dork. I acted like a dork. I looked like a dork. I quacked like a dork. In high school, I felt awkward and ungainly. And maybe not a little bit paranoid. Like everyone would see this girl too needy for her own good. Who masturbated and felt incredibly exposed because of it. Guilty because I didn’t want them to know my secret, but somehow they knew. Looking at me. Even smelling me. My not so secret shame.“And I was omnivorous in my wanting. Whether it was the prettiest girl or the. "All eyes shifted to Edwina, who started visibly shaking as Irene resumed her stool. Somebody opened his mouth, but Irene held up a finger and whoever it was shut up. "Baby," she addressed Edwina. "You don't have to do nothing -- you can just walk away. But this is a hump -- after you do this, it'll all be downhill for a while..." Irwin, mesmerized, drew a finger along the outside of Irene's thigh; she eyed him placidly and said nothing.Edwina looked beseechingly at Irene, who nodded, then.
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